Spatiu cu Sens

Author: Iulia

  • how do I keep myself clear?

    it was around one year ago when I was having a conversation with Ronen, in which I asked him about “how do I keep clear… not deluding myself?”

    he answered this:

    1. continue to be alert and ask that question;
    2. describe more specifically what “old stories” mean so that you can recognize when you see them;
    3. act! – it’s one to want / say something and other thing to DO something about it;
    4. do it gradually; take time to reflect how you feel about your actions. Don’t just DO and move on. Let time to see effects, see where the waves of actions are taking you.
    5. do more of “small” actions instead of many “big” ones. every day; intentionally.
    6. when you speak of doing something and not doing it, not taking it into action – observe and reflect on it.
    7. be patient – wait, observe;
    8. take into consideration that…, allow yourself to do mistakes.

    I wrote this post from a transcription (Romanian) in my journal… and when I noted it down I took it from our Skype conversations… later then our conversation. where you see the “…” above, I missed to note down some text there… and now the old conversations in Skype cannot be accessed anymore… but I(you) got the point ;).

    what matters and what I want to say with this post is that it helped me along the way in the last year… in the last 9 years since I started breathing consciously (sometimes, at least)… and every time I see reactions in myself and others around me, I keep remembering this conversation and observing (thoughts, senzations, reactions)… helps me coming back to the center… in the present, keeps me in contact with the unfolding, with the feedback… and brings detachment from emotions, sensations, reactions that surface in different times of life.

    I noted it down because I like Ronen’s style of being specific, pragmatic, systemic and holistic in the same time, clear about profound and meaningful themes of life.

  • friction and falling apart

    to whom it may concern ๐Ÿ™‚

    “The process of awakening inevitably creates friction, because part of this process has to do with the deconstruction of everything that is false. If our entire lives have been based upon a false identity, then we may get the impression that everything is falling apart. When we begin walking the path of self-knowledge, we begin to wake up and move towards self-realization, which is synonymous with putting an end to our fantasies. This can be very challenging. At this moment, it is necessary to remember that this deconstruction is part of the process. We are being reborn to a new life.”

    via Sri Prem Baba – flower of the day

    may all being know peace and harmony within

  • Christopher Alexander on Working on Wholeness

    Ronen posted this quote some days ago…

    I read it a couple of times up to know and every time I did it what came to my mind is… the mechanistic way of hiring people in the business environment, and the total lack of unfolding processes in the teams, in the organizations.

    these are the main reasons I left my career back in October 2008: I could not find the place for the holistic-humane-whole approach in any organizational process and not having “the satisfaction of working on a psychological whole and making it complete“, in our teams.

    and I was influencing people’s lives big time.

    last year (I remember it was February) I knew inside I will never find a place back into the “business” as it looks now. in the last years I was struggling with different thoughts… it might sound familiar: “not good enough”, “I am nonadaptive”, “why do I need humane in my work? it’s a ONLY a job!”, “anyone else can do it but me!” etc.

    now I am at peace about it… and grateful for it…

    grateful for each colleague I’ve worked with… for it offered me those experiences…

  • the four enemies

    As I was getting ready to leave, I decided to ask him once more about the enemies of a man of knowledge. I argued that I could not return for some time, and it would be a good idea to write down what he had to say and then think about it while I was away. He hesitated for a while, but then began to talk.

    “When a man starts to learn, he is never clear about his objectives. His purpose is faulty; his intent is vague. He hopes for rewards that will never materialize, for he knows nothing of the hardships of learning. “He slowly begins to learn… bit by bit at first, then in big chunks. And his thoughts soon clash. What he learns is never what he pictured, or imagined, and so he begins to be afraid. Learning is never what one expects. Every step of learning is a new task, and the fear the man is experiencing begins to mount mercilessly, unyieldingly. His purpose becomes a battlefield.

    “And thus he has tumbled upon the first of his natural enemies: Fear!

    A terrible enemy… treacherous, and difficult to overcome. It remains concealed at every turn of the way, prowling… waiting. And if the man, terrified in its presence, runs away, his enemy will have put an end to his quest.”
    “What will happen to the man if he runs away in fear?”
    “Nothing happens to him except that he will never learn. He will never become a man of knowledge. He will perhaps be a bully or a harmless, scared man; at any rate, he will be a defeated man. His first enemy will have put an end to his cravings.”
    “And what can he do to overcome fear?”
    “The answer is very simple. He must not run away. He must defy his fear, and in spite of it he must take the next step in learning, and the next, and the next. He must be fully afraid, and yet he must not stop. That is the rule! And a moment will come when his first enemy retreats. The man begins to feel sure of himself. His intent becomes stronger. Learning is no longer a terrifying task. “When this joyful moment comes, the man can say without hesitation that he has defeated his first natural enemy.”

    “Does it happen at once, don Juan, or little by little?”
    “It happens little by little, and yet the fear is vanquished suddenly and fast.”
    “But wonโ€™t the man be afraid again if something new happens to him?”
    “No. Once a man has vanquished fear, he is free from it for the rest of his life because, instead of fear, he has acquired clarity… a clarity of mind which erases fear. By then a man knows his desires; he knows how to satisfy those desires. He can anticipate the new steps of learning, and a sharp clarity surrounds everything. The man feels that nothing is concealed.

    “And thus he has encountered his second enemy: Clarity!

    That clarity of mind, which is so hard to obtain, dispels fear, but also blinds. “It forces the man never to doubt himself. It gives him the assurance he can do anything he pleases, for he sees clearly into everything. And he is courageous because he is clear, and he stops at nothing because he is clear. But all that is a mistake; it is like something incomplete. If the man yields to this make-believe power, he has succumbed to his second enemy and will fumble with learning. He will rush when he should be patient, or he will be patient when he should rush. And he will fumble with learning until he winds up incapable of learning anything more.”

    “What becomes of a man who is defeated in that way, don Juan? Does he die as a result?”
    “No, he doesnโ€™t die. His second enemy has just stopped him cold from trying to become a man of knowledge; instead, the man may turn into a buoyant warrior, or a clown. Yet the clarity for which he has paid so dearly will never change to darkness and fear again. He will be clear as long as he lives, but he will no longer learn, or yearn for, anything.”

    “But what does he have to do to avoid being defeated?”
    “He must do what he did with fear: he must defy his clarity and use it only to see, and wait patiently and measure carefully before taking new steps; he must think, above all, that his clarity is almost a mistake. And a moment will come when he will understand that his clarity was only a point before his eyes. And thus he will have overcome his second enemy, and will arrive at a position where nothing can harm him any more. This will not be a mistake. It will not be only a point before his eyes. It will be true power. “He will know at this point that the power he has been pursuing for so long is finally his. He can do with it whatever he pleases. His ally is at his command. His wish is the rule. He sees all that is around him.

    But he has also come across his third enemy: Power!

    “Power is the strongest of all enemies. And naturally the easiest thing to do is to give in; after all, the man is truly invincible. He commands; he begins by taking calculated risks, and ends in making rules, because he is a master. “A man at this stage hardly notices his third enemy closing in on him. And suddenly, without knowing, he will certainly have lost the battle. His enemy will have turned him into a cruel, capricious man.”

    “Will he lose his power?”
    “No, he will never lose his clarity or his power.”
    “What then will distinguish him from a man of knowledge?”
    “A man who is defeated by power dies without really knowing how to handle it. Power is only a burden upon his fate. Such a man has no command over himself, and cannot tell when or how to use his power.”
    “Is the defeat by any of these enemies a final defeat?”
    “Of course it is final. Once one of these enemies overpowers a man there is nothing he can do.”
    “Is it possible, for instance, that the man who is defeated by power may see his error and mend his ways?”
    “No. Once a man gives in he is through.”

    “But what if he is temporarily blinded by power, and then refuses it?”
    “That means his battle is still on. That means he is still trying to become a man of knowledge. A man is defeated only when he no longer tries, and abandons himself.”
    “But then, don Juan, it is possible that a man may abandon himself to fear for years, but finally conquer it?”
    “No, that is not true. If he gives in to fear he will never conquer it, because he will shy away from learning and never try again. But if he tries to learn for years in the midst of his fear, he will eventually conquer it because he will never have really abandoned himself to it.”

    “How can he defeat his third enemy, don Juan?”
    “He has to defy it, deliberately. He has to come to realize the power he has seemingly conquered is in reality never his. He must keep himself in line at all times, handling carefully and faithfully all that he has learned. If he can see that clarity and power, without his control over himself, are worse than mistakes, he will reach a point where everything is held in check. He will know then when and how to use his power. And thus he will have defeated his third enemy.

    “The man will be, by then, at the end of his journey of learning… and almost without warning he will come upon the last of his enemies: Old age!

    This enemy is the cruelest of all, the one he wonโ€™t be able to defeat completely, but only fight away. “This is the time when a man has no more fears, no more impatient clarity of mind… a time when all his power is in check, but also the time when he has an unyielding desire to rest. If he gives in totally to his desire to lie down and forget, if he soothes himself in tiredness, he will have lost his last round, and his enemy will cut him down into a feeble old creature. His desire to retreat will overrule all his clarity, his power, and his knowledge.

    “But if the man sloughs off his tiredness, and lives his fate through, he can then be called a man of knowledge, if only for the brief moment when he succeeds in fighting off his last, invincible enemy. That moment of clarity, power, and knowledge is enough.”

    The Teachings of Don Juan: A Yaqui Way of Knowledge by Carlos Castaneda

  • perspective

    Is spirit pregnant with their manifested bodies or the bodies pregnant with their encompasing spirit?…

  • identify the mystery

    Ronen just sent us this link to Paul‘s post from today.

    <3
    finding myself more and more comfortable in this…
    this… trusting the mystery…
    this… more and more comfortable “I don’t know”… it’s even soothing sometimes!!! reconnects me with peace…
    this… trusting that I (higher self) is and will ALWAYS find (re/discovering) the way…
    this… unfolding… without the need of knowing where… how… if…
    this… being in contact with the feeling and the feedback… and gradually adapting to what IS…
    this… freedom I am in touch with in some moments…
    this… knowing it is me!…
    this… wanting to be and going for it… where all THESE are nurtured… respected… supported… and can be expressed in a way I feel and am “normal”…
    THIS is HOME!
    _/\_
    <3
  • my face

    there is something coming out when you touch my face.

    this time I could be with it… I was offered the space and time to observe and be with it.

    it is tapping directly into my subconsciousness… into my emotional body. it is so abrupt my rational mind doesn’t have time to say, do something about it.

    I noticed mixed feelings being expressed in my body: sadness, acceptance and being-feeling loved. it was the first time I can clearly be with it, let it be and name it.

    thank you for offering this space and time.

  • the essential purpose of Yoga practice

    The essential purpose of yoga practice is to reduce avidya so that understanding can gradually come to surface. But how can we know whether we have seen and understood things clearly? When we see the truth, when we reach a level that is higher than our normal everyday understanding, something deep within us is very quiet and peaceful. Then there is a contentment that nothing can take from us. It is not the kind of satisfaction derived from gazing at a beautiful object. It is much more than this. It is a satisfaction deep within us that is free from feeling and judgement. The center of this contentment is the purusa.

    T.K.V. Desikatchar โ€“ The Heart of Yoga. Developing a Personal Practice โ€“ 8 The Things That Darken the Heart

  • observing the breath

    Even though it seams like such an easy thing, it is actually very difficult simply to follow the movement of the breath. In the moment when we concentrate on the breath it has a tendency to change; we are inclined to control the natural breathing ratio, to disturb it. When we follow the breath we tend to go in one of two directions – either we occupy ourselves with the feel of the breath or we simply observe it. If we just observe we do not need to to anything with the activity of the breath itself. It is like watching the flow of a river. When we are able to this we find ourselves almost in a state of meditation. This is the reason why we are sometimes advised simply to observe the breath: as we do this our mind quiets down. It is not easy, but it is marvelous.

    T.K.V. Desikatchar โ€“ The Heart of Yoga. Developing a Personal Practice โ€“ 6 Pranayama

     

    this is yoga…

    this is vipassana…

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